Bond. James Bond.

Netflix and Apple are both in talks to purchase MGM. Not surprised by this in the least as the studio has released less and less original content since they dodged bankruptcy back in ‘86 by selling most of their back catalogue to Turner. Mostly they’ve gotten by on the franchises they own the rights too.

Like James Bond.

I personally hope Netflix lands it. Not only are movie theaters dead but I'd like to see what they do with Bond as I believe the producers really need to take a minute and consider how they should go forward with the series.

The latest Bond film has been a debacle. Over budget. Over schedule — Craig hurt himself again. Shooting most of the time without a script. And now the release date is delayed almost a year because they’ve spent so much on the film, it has to have a theatrical release to break even.

Also, the Craig Era is, I think, the worst James Bond era. Not because of Craig--he’s a fine Bond and the most athletic and badass feeling. He looks good in a suit and looks like he could kick your ass.

The problem is what they’ve done to Bond and the franchise: 

1.) They made Bond into Bourne. Humorless. Gritty. Traumatized. Realistic. Yes, the Bond is the books is grittier then the films, but the Bond in the books still manages to be fun. These films are not. And Bond can have humor without turning into Roger Moore.

2.) Bond kills a lot of people just because, instead of killing because the mission necessitates it. He’s an assassin, not a sociopath. 

 3.) Bond is always being armchair quarterbacked/fighting with the higher ups. What’s the point of having a license to kill if the boss is always chatting in your ear? What’s the point of having a secret agent if you’ve got tracking devices implanted on him — kind of makes him less secret doesn’t it? Ever hear of hackers? Besides that, it breaks the audience out of the action.

4.) Garbled storyline—first two films are an extended origin story showing Bond becoming the agent we know. Then the narrative is immediately: the 00 program is outdated. So why am I watching this then? 

Plus tons of plot points that make no sense (Spectre’s plot is the worst—the worst) and a poor attempt at constructing an ongoing storyline have all made Bond convoluted and dull. Besides that, Bond films don’t need a runtime of 2 hours and 45 minutes or a production cost of $300 million.

Whatever happens next with Bond, I hope it's fun and cool and sexy again. Can still have a serious tone, but enough with the navel-gazing and the downer films.

Popular posts from this blog

Why I No Longer Watch SVU Even Though I Think Mariska Hargitay Is Hot

T.E.D. Klein's 13 Most Terrifying Stories